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Mugging Christmas to one and all

Well here we are, the final issue of the year. And if it is not depressing enough that you are going to have to wait until January to get your next Hi-Tech Security Solutions, you are going to do it during a season when every retail store does its utmost to induce psychotic episodes in as many customers as possible while acquiescing to simply be as annoying as possible to the rest.

I think it is unfair that the CGC’s Michael Broughton should have security tips for retailers ('Crime up, takings down') while ignoring the customers who will also need security and sanity tips to see them through to January. In this jolly old season of lunatic spending, debt absorption and frayed nerves, therefore, here are some survival tips for the ever-abused consumer. (Hi-Tech Security Solutions, its publisher and anyone who has ever met any of us – whether they passed woodwork or not – take no responsibility for the contents of this article.)

Let us start with the obvious. Rest assured that the criminal element is also out Christmas shopping with a vengeance. Retailers are getting clever in their cash handling, forcing these scoundrels to work harder – it will soon be less stressful and more profitable for them to get a union-controlled job.

Of course crime is a bad thing and should be avoided, if possible, but it will also provide you with something to think about apart from being driven insane by Boney M and screaming hooligans – and then there are the children! It is high time South Africa followed the American tradition of sending children to summer camp during the holidays. I hear Zimbabwe is nice this time of year.

For those getting in a family holiday before everything goes insane in the build up to the FIFA 2010 Soccer Cup, beware the careless fools on the road that can make your holiday a nightmare with their stupid driving. And remember, it is not only ANC blue-light convoys that drive like hooligans.

Also be aware that the police in all their different forms are going to be out in force to catch drunk and careless drivers that do not have political connections. Times are tough and their Christmas bonus reserves also need a boost. Fortunately you can relax during the World Cup next year when everyone in the security apparatus will be protecting soccer players, international visitors and FIFA instead of you.

Send us your funny, hilarious and scandalous

And while you are posing for the hidden CCTV cameras in your favourite retailer’s changing booths, do not forget that we want all your dirty secrets for our Axis competition ('Axis celebrates 25 years in the network business'). Well, we are not looking for those videos, but the funny, unusual and weird ones taken with an Axis camera.

There is a great Axis prize up for grabs so get editing. And please do not send in hour-long HD videos, short and sweet does the trick.

And finally, look out for the January issue of Hi-Tech Security Solutions, we have got a new design that will put us even further ahead of the market than we already are – in our humble opinion, of course.

And there it is. Enjoy this issue, enjoy the festive season and let us hope the constant mumblings about the end of the recession are true and next year is more of a boom than a bust. Happy and safe holidays to all.

Andrew Seldon

Editor

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